Are you a Tekken fan? Have you been playing Tekken since it was released on the PSX many years ago? After all those years and many sequels later, did you happen to don a Jaguar mask and piledrive animals into the pavement? Did you wrestle a panda or a brown bear into submission? Have you attempted to put gloves on a kangaroo and decide to beat the living shit out of it because Tekken told you to? I’m going to guess the answer is no to all of these. Why? Because most of us are sensible human beings and know what a video game is. Unfortunately, in this day and age, you don’t know who you’ll offend anymore because it was announced that they had removed Roger the Kangaroo from Tekken 7.
Due to a recent viral video of a man punching a kangaroo, Namco felt that it would be best to remove Roger the Kangaroo altogether to avoid any backlash from animal rights activist groups. Namco released a statement about their recent interaction with PITA.
“Members of PITA approached our [Namco] headquarters and demanded that they take out the iconic kangaroo because kangaroos aren’t meant to wear gloves and box people. They yelled, screamed, cried, and even threw pita bread at our windows to make sure we got the message – the message was fully received. Not only did we remove Roger from the game, but we were now fully stocked with endless pita bread. We celebrated in the offices with homemade shwarma.”
Roger the Kangaroo Doesn’t Need PITA’s Protection
Personally? I think this whole thing is dumb. In reference to the video, it’s evident that the man was trying to protect his dog. Once he punched the kangaroo and asserted his dominance of the situation, he let it go and wrangled his dogs. He didn’t chase after the kangaroo and put the beat down on it. If that had happened, then yes, I would totally understand why they’d remove Roger from the roster. So what now? Are they going to remove Kuma and Panda from the roster as well? Because we’re punching and kicking a virtual bear and panda, does that mean we’re going to out and fight one? Here’s a hint on what would happen if someone did go out and try to punch a bear.
***Quack Reactor is a satirical segment on Nerd Reactor.***
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